Dear ________:

Al Quandt · Post by **Al Quandt** » Wed Jan 10, 2007 11:38 am

Dear Burger King,

When you feel that you must make me wait in a drive thru for over 15 minutes (making me late for work), PLEASE take that time to make sure that my food is worthy of eating. My tator tots were stale, my cina minis were cold and hard, and my sandwich was cold. Seriously folks there were 3 people in line for the drive thru and from what I could see of the counter, there was nobody waiting to order.

So WTF???
Sincerly,
My grumpy ass (not to be confused with my moody colon)

jewlee138 · Post by **jewlee138** » Wed Jan 10, 2007 1:09 pm

Dear Fleek:

I miss your sexy ass. Please call and/or write like you used to.

-me

Oliver's Army · Post by **Oliver's Army** » Mon Jan 15, 2007 6:37 pm

Mr Mellencamp.

While I appreciate your long and fruitful career, I really don't need or want you reminding me during EVERY football game that I ain't sh*t' if I don't drive a Chevy Truck. Like I was some kind of commie-loving quiche-eater who kicks puppies and poops on the flag for profit.

Really.

Every game.

Dozens of times.

Hate it.

Still.

(calling Evans Toyota truck department right now)

adam atherton · Post by **adam atherton** » Wed Jan 17, 2007 2:58 pm

.....Subway Sandwich Artist,

when you and I work together building my lunch from scratch, you look like an idiot when we get to the cash register and you ask what i have.

you are now Subway Sandwich Retardist.

The_Dude · Post by **The_Dude** » Wed Jan 17, 2007 3:09 pm

Dear Tom Brady,

Disappear.

Thank you.

Oliver's Army · Post by **Oliver's Army** » Wed Jan 17, 2007 3:12 pm

Dear 4th grade teacher who left her students at the RCA dome.

Please pick them up, they are beating the Patriots 49-3

Thanks

Indy.

Oliver's Army · Post by **Oliver's Army** » Wed Jan 17, 2007 4:12 pm

Indiana News Center

Re: news jingle/music video.

Please see above post re:Mr. Mellencamp's Chevy tune.

Imitation IS NOT the sincerest form of flattery.

Your jingle/video is bad. Corn-fed Hoosier hokey-ness.

Don't like it....nope...not one bit.

But it's at least crap in Hi-Def.

bassjones · Post by **bassjones** » Wed Jan 17, 2007 6:12 pm

Oliver's Army wrote:Dear 4th grade teacher who left her students at the RCA dome.

Please pick them up, they are beating the Patriots 49-3

Thanks

Indy.

Which means Peyton Manning's multi-million dollar contract now looks really bad for us.

sevesd93 · Post by **sevesd93** » Wed Jan 17, 2007 6:58 pm

Dear John Crawford,

f**k YOU!!!!!

=^-..-^= · Post by **=^-..-^=** » Thu Jan 18, 2007 1:17 am

Dear *insert whatever band here*

Please don't record a far superior song for radio play that sounds NOTHING like the rest of your album. If you don't have decent material, stay out of the studio until you do. I can't afford that many bad albums anymore.

MrSpall · Post by **MrSpall** » Sun Jan 21, 2007 1:11 pm

Dear Cop Patrolling Jefferson Friday Night,

When you saw me pulling out of the Chevvy's parking lot and into the left turn only lane from Jefferson to Ardmore you claim to have seen me weaving. However, given that I'd only driven about 50 feet, all of which while turning, it wasn't possible for me to have been weaving! Moreover, when you said "Saw ya leavin' the bar there - you been drinkin' tonight?" It was kind of a dead give away of your sinister ulterior motive for pulling me over - you saw a 20-something guy leave a bar at 2am and assumed I was a drunk driver. Fooled you when I blew a .02 huh? Some of us are careful about how we drink, especially before driving. Of course, as I sat there being harassed for no reason I'm sure multiple others who WERE drunk probably got in their cars and went right past us. Way to go.

P.S. My window doesn't go down. Stop yelling at me to "Remain in the vehicle!" when I open the door.

quantum_driveshaft · Post by **quantum_driveshaft** » Mon Jan 22, 2007 5:06 am

Dear World:
Thanks for forking up.

G Fresh · Post by **G Fresh** » Mon Jan 22, 2007 5:16 am

Dear Colts,

Thank you, thank you, thank you for finally getting it right, albeit in an almost heart attack inducing manner. Just one more to go and I can die a happy man, so don't f*ck it up.

Sincerely,

Matt

Dear Bears,

We're coming.

Forebodingly Yours,

Matt

bassplayer92 · Post by **bassplayer92** » Mon Jan 22, 2007 11:04 pm

Dear Tony Dunji I think having the Super Bowl in Fort Wayne is just fine.

Good thinking.

adam atherton · Post by **adam atherton** » Wed Jan 24, 2007 10:14 am

...verizon wireless "customer service" employees:

if you have no idea how your company or service works, dont answer the phone when it rings.