In case you didn't get the memo...

[traumaqueen]

...(and it seems that most didn't) here is your copy:

To: All Drivers
From: The Bean
CC: Mother Nature, Jack Frost, Old Man Winter

Today is the first significant snowfall of Winter 2006. Please keep in mind that you may want to reduce speeds accordingly for safety. Kindly also note that this does not, however, justify reducing your speed to 30 mph on the interstates. It is not time for this level of action yet. The current snow "Flurries" do not indicate a level of reduced visibility that would warrant this slow of a vehicle speed. Mild "wind gusts" present today, accompanied by the scant snowfall, have not created those icy conditions that usually require the use of such creeping speeds. This will undoubtedly occur later in the season, but today will not be the day. It is appreciated if you would save this level of caution for Winter Storm Time. When Winter Storm Time weather appears, most other Drivers will desire to join in extremely slow speeds to avoid slide-offs, spin-outs, Motor Vehicle Collisions (MVC), etc. They will also be planning ahead for use of Slow Speeds, and will have allowed time for use of such. Until said time, please continue with a more reasonable caution and less extreme use of Slow Speeds. When you resort to Slow Speeds too early in the season and/or out of proportion to the conditions, it creates an unsafe environment; not only for yourself, but for the Reasonable Drivers as well. It is requested that Unreasonable Drivers do not make themselves the cause of otherwise avoidable MVC's, not to mention good old-fashioned Frustration and/or Tardiness.
One helpful suggestion may be to take a route through urban streetways that allow for Slow Speeds.
Thank you for your prompt attention to this matter. Please feel free to contact me with any questions, comments, concerns, or solution-seeking suggestions.
Thank you for all you do to make Driving successful!

[cwallace]

What is it about people and snow? They suddenly forget how to drive...

They get pissed when you are going a little slower than usual...

Idiots...I drive and old sh*tty truck and hit a deer with my nice jeep...so I don't give a damn this winter season. So be forwarned...f**k with me this winter and I will take it out on YOUR car with MY car...

And again...happy HOLIDAYS!

Chris

[Oliver's Army]

For those who don't know already, here is the formula for Indiana snow accumulation.

Flurries = Warm and sunny day.

Light snow possible = Cloudy.

Snow likely = No Snow, maybe.

Possible accumulations = light dusting

Snow alert = Snow that melts on contact

Winter weather advisory = Some accumulation

Code Red Snow emergency = slight inconvenience on your way to work.

School cancellations = kids' today are pussies and over-protected.

[The_Dude]

I was blown away when I moved to Indiana in Jr. High and we had our first fog delay.

But yeah...it sure sucked driving 5 miles to work on my bicycle in 2 feet of snow this morning with no shoes or socks on.

[WBOB]

School cancellations = kids' today are pussies and over-protected.

this one slays me.

There was a time last year when FWCS, had a 2 hour delay
called the day before on the "assumption" of bad weather.


Have we become that much "wussified"??

[The_Dude]

School cancellations = kids' today are pussies and over-protected.

this one slays me.

There was a time last year when FWCS, had a 2 hour delay
called the day before on the "assumption" of bad weather.


Have we become that much "wussified"??

Insurance.

[bassjones]

School cancellations = kids' today are pussies and over-protected.

this one slays me.

There was a time last year when FWCS, had a 2 hour delay
called the day before on the "assumption" of bad weather.


Have we become that much "wussified"??

Lawyers.

fixed...

[G Fresh]

School cancellations = kids' today are pussies and over-protected.

this one slays me.

There was a time last year when FWCS, had a 2 hour delay
called the day before on the "assumption" of bad weather.


Have we become that much "wussified"??

Geez, back in my day we would've had to have had woolly mastodons fighting in the streets before they would have called a snow day...and I'm not even in my 30s yet.

[WBOB]

School cancellations = kids' today are pussies and over-protected.

this one slays me.

There was a time last year when FWCS, had a 2 hour delay
called the day before on the "assumption" of bad weather.


Have we become that much "wussified"??

Geez, back in my day we would've had to have had woolly mastodons fighting in the streets before they would have called a snow day...and I'm not even in my 30s yet.

One thing I forgot to mention on the above is, after calling the
delay, the weather that was supposed to cause this ended up
missing the city and we got NADDA.

No Adminstrator Left Behind.

[Sankofa]

School cancellations = School boards fear lawsuits from parents of those possibly injured who have to travel far by school bus.

[zenmandan]

You know what really grinds my gears? TV stations that give free reign to morons like Sandy Thompson to break into shows every 5 minutes because it "looks like some bad weather" is approaching. IT'S DECEMBER. WE'RE IN INDIANA.
IT IS GOING TO SNOW!
forking Christ. We don't need some butthead cutting into fine shows like Show Me the Money to tell us that it MIGHT snow. Good god. Take a look outside. See snow? Drive with some common sense. Check the weather channel. See snow on the way? Be prepared. In the last few years the forking meteorologists have taken over our TV's from December through April, all because we may have some bad weather. How many REALLY bad storms have we had in the last few years? How many times has Sandy T broken into a show every ten minutes to let us know that a storm cloud was spotted somewhere over Nebraska and we better all run to our basements?

That, and never being able to find the right droids when you need them.

And that's what really grinds my gears.

[Jambrea]

You know what really grinds my gears? TV stations that give free reign to morons like Sandy Thompson to break into shows every 5 minutes because it "looks like some bad weather" is approaching. IT'S DECEMBER. WE'RE IN INDIANA.
IT IS GOING TO SNOW!
f*#king Christ. We don't need some assh*le cutting into fine shows like Show Me the Money to tell us that it MIGHT snow. Good god. Take a look outside. See snow? Drive with some common sense. Check the weather channel. See snow on the way? Be prepared. In the last few years the f*#king meteorologists have taken over our TV's from December through April, all because we may have some bad weather. How many REALLY bad storms have we had in the last few years? How many times has Sandy T broken into a show every ten minutes to let us know that a storm cloud was spotted somewhere over Nebraska and we better all run to our basements?

I agree! Why can't they just run the scroll across the bottom of the tv!?!?!?!?! That works just fine!

[Oliver's Army]

What always got me was a "Snow Emergency" or "Winter Weather Warning" or whatever.

I mean... a tornado...THAT needs a WARNING!!!

But snow?

I think after a couple hours of heavy snow I could figure it out for myself.

Its not like 15 inches of snow is gonna drop at once like a giant mattress.

*That* would warrant some kind of Snow Emergency.

WARNING!!! GIANT SLAB OF SNOW IS A-COMIN'



that would f**k up your whole day.

[subgenius88]

School cancellations = kids' today are pussies

When were kids not pussies? Get in your time machine and find me a 7 year old from any era and I will wipe the floor with him.

[MrSpall]

We don't need some assh*le cutting into fine shows like Show Me the Money to tell us that it MIGHT snow.

This line made me laugh so hard I almost snotted on my screen.