just some old thoughts

[Al Quandt]

I came around again to check in on myself
A few years of rearranging hoops to no end.
Left me here where I stand
I can’t help but wish for one thing these days
To meet me as me, not how I am but who I am.
My light seams to fleetingly flicker as if it wants to break open into flames

Sound asleep I am catching ideals only known to a crazy man.
Quietly whistling along to the tune as if I was not this individual
Sitting awake and watching as the earth confronts this monstrosity,
Folds him in two, and passes him out as bread and wine.

Who could ever want to walk hand in hand to the edge of this tricky mess?
So be it a monster who may ravage all the waste from my endless debt
So be it a tall tale from which I base my completely intact and idiotic decisions.
So be it the last whipping post that I will ever willingly kneel before.

Just a whisper, Just a notion, and I’ll pick up all that I know and forfeit my face.
Just a whimper and a cry from your filthy mouth and I will snap sixteen bones in you
Then place them gently and orderly into the palm of your hand
I am, and I will be your last fault and your new beginning, for life as we know it.